I'm a decent driver...not the best, but tonight I felt like James Bond.  It was pretty awesome.  We're getting some light flurries tonight, and the roads were a bit slick on my way home from work.  I got to the intersection I have to turn down to get to my apartment off of Oakland Ave, and as I went to make the turn, the car started sliding.  As per usual with a ford focus, the rear end started swinging around.  I'm so used to it that I started steering in the direction of the skid and started to regain control.  I ended up perfectly lining up with the road I needed as I regained full control.  I never stopped moving and just continued on down the road.  It was so perfectly timed, that the guy driving the SUV that was waiting at the corner  that watched the whole thing was laughing and apploading me in his car.  I had a big grin on my face and gave him a thumbs up.  Not going to lie...I felt damn cool after that, and I had to share.  I hope you can visualize it and join me in the coolness.  Yay for defensive driving!

No...I'm not bitching about my breakup.  I just have the song stuck in my head.  It's been there for at least a week now.  I even dropped the three dollars for both the mp3 download and the video on iTunes.  I can't help it.  It's a sexy video and a catchy song.  I find it incredibly impressive that those women can move like that.  I look like a dufus any time I try to dance, and no, there will be no video posting of that.

The news of the week is that I finally got called by the debt consolidation people.  I've been enrolled and start my payments on the 25th.  I'm just wainting for the paperwork to arrive via priority mail.  So...in 5 years I will be debt free.  That's a great feeling.  It's looking like the plan will save me 110 dollars a month, but we'll have to see for sure when all is said and done.

I also got my designs done for one of my clients.  That's been sent off and now I'm just waiting to hear back on the choice.  Then I can get started on the flash parts of it.  I'm actually kind of excited about it because it involves more learning.  I truly enjoy it.

Speaking of the web, after spending more time with my budget, I decided to start working on software for budget and money tracking online.  I don't want to pay for Quicken anymore.  Mint seems to have its downfalls, and I know from the past that when I design something, I really learn a lot.  I will learn how to budget better than any book.

I think I'm going to put together a database schema for translife too.  I think I might as well create my own social network site.  This will be fun / a lot of work.  Speaking of a lot of work, I haven't decided whether I should move my list of chapters for my book onto this blog, google docs, or just keep it on the pad I have it on.  I might get tempted to work on it at work.  I probably shouldn't do that.

Oh, and I was informed of a few jobs that I am planning on applying for.  That's Tuesday night's goal.  I'm going to attempt to keep myself busy every night until the weekend so I can relax then. Who knows though. Maybe I'll spend the weekend working on a new demo reel.  We'll see.

I'll post more about my recently developed workaholism soon.  Happy January.

Today I was on Yahoo and saw a headline about checking your 2009 horoscope.  I'm not one of those people that lives by horoscopes and abides by their every word, but I am a big proponent of quantum mechanics and intention.  So, I sometimes look when I feel like I need a message of some sort. Anyway, here's what the horoscope said for my sign:

Aquarius Outlook for 2009

Aquarius

1/20 - 2/18

Year 2009 Overview

Aquarius is all about a new vision in 2009, and working to move our planet toward the highest and healthiest quality of life. You are highly energized with this wonderful alignment, and your inspiration is rekindled to move energy in grandiose ways. You are able to utilize these high frequencies in order to create new structure and value in people's lives.

This is no time to sit back and let anything slip through your fingers. Express yourself and move forward with your visionary ideas. As you forge ahead, you find a reworking of meaning on a deep level, and discover possibilities as you connect with your highest star.

Your ideas have always been ahead of the times, and now you are a shining example of what the Earth force can assimilate into everyday living. You realize that the world was created with structure, and outdated modes of living that no longer serve mankind are being recognized around the world. It's time to let go of anything that holds you back. New thinking is on the horizon, and people are ready to align with the quickly changing energies of the planets. Your leadership skills will help humanity make these shifts, and you will feel supported by those who understand the need to create peace and harmony.

Be inventive in channeling your dreams into reality. As you find a place to manifest this energy, it will become easy for you to usher in a better world. The time to realize your highest ideals is here!

Considering what's been going on in my head lately, I felt that this was an encouraging sign.  I guess that means I'll be pushing forward with my book. :)

My 10 New Years Resolutions:

1. To be in a stable and secure financial situation by year end 2009
2. Write my book
3. Get TransLife.net, JessicaJaniuk.com, and TranscendingProductions.com all designed and updated
4. Get at least 6 paying speaking gigs
5. Find a new, fulfilling, and prosperous career path
6. Get my treatment written for my documentary
7. Apply for several women in business grants for camera equipment and software
8. Be a more active person in both my professional and personal life
9. Read more
10. Be Happy

I know...they're more life goals than resolutions, but I think they're healthy and acheivable. Maybe I'll check in with these monthly to see where I am.

Happy New Year!! Peace on Earth and good will toward all people.

Here's a little story from my past.  When I was in the midst of my transition and seeing a therapist regularly, I talked about my sexuality in a session.  The issue was brought up because I was pretty much just dealing with figuring out my gender and wasn't touching my sexuality.  He asked me if I wanted to experiment and figure out my sexuality too.  I told him no.  I just wanted to focus on my gender identity and worry about my sexuality later.

As it turns out, that worked well for me.  I am very comfortable in my own skin now, and I'm quite happy with my gender identity.  I  just haven't spent much time with my sexuality. There are a few things I know.  I know I'm attracted to femininity.  I know what body type is physically attractive to me, and I know what personalities mesh with me.  Up until recently, I didn't know what I was truly attracted to sexually.

I've learned a lot from recent relationships.  I've pretty much realized that unless the genetic woman is something very special, I think I'm more interested in dating transwomen.  I've recently been talking to some trans friends of mine and have been connecting a lot better.  I guess I can't say for certain yet, but it seems that way right now.  I'm sure I'll find out.

One of the things that I think is important to me is self actualization.  I think it's important to be with someone who's settled in to their identity and are comfortable with themselves.  I remember going through my stages before self actualizing, and I was all over the place.  I wasn't ready for love.  So yeah...that's important.

Anyway, I'm freezing.  Chris' apartment is like 64 degrees. I'm going to go find a blanket. Happy Early New Year!