Blog

The semester is almost at an end. Let me tell you, it couldn't

come any sooner. I am so sick of papers, presentations, and group

projects. I am definitely ready for a month off. It'll be nice. I don't

have work, which kinda sucks, but at least I can relax. I have a list

of things I want to do in the meantime. I'm kind of excited about some

of them, for example...I have "nothing" specifically written down. So

that ensures that I must do a certain amount of nothing during break.

OK, time to begin the massive recap of the past several weeks starting

with the most important and moving to the less important...

Lindsay and I are officially a couple now. :) YAY!!! We've seen as much

of each other as we can. It's an hour drive to see each other, but it's

been worth it. We have so much in common, it's crazy. I've spent every

night on the phone with her save one or two nights. It's been great.

I'm really happy. I know she is too.

I have a new kitty. His name currently is George, but I am planning on

changing it to something a little less generic. He's a black kitty, but

he has white hairs randomly throughout his fur. So I might go with the

name Dan D. Ruff. I'm a dork, I know. But I like it. I've also had

other thoughts too, but I'm not sure. How about a poll?

!++10++!

I can't wait to see the results. If you have a suggestion, comment and let me know.

Let's see...other stuff... Ah, school. So, the past two weeks have been

solid work. I had project after project due. I had a ten page paper

that I had to turn in a week and a half ago. I did turn it in, but I

only got about 2 pages of it done. That paper was due at the end of the

first week. That week was the worst of the two as far as stress is

concerned. I woke up every day in a panic. Literally, my alarm clock

would go off, and I'd sit up in my bed freaking out that I was late or

didn't get something done. I didn't sleep well all week, and by the end

of the week I was so frazzled that my paper just didn't happen. On top

of that, the content of the paper was a bit close to home, which made

it difficult to read. By the time I was trying to read through the

sources, I was in a solid panic. I couldn't get through any of it to

save my life. So, I gave up and tried to go to sleep. I couldn't sleep.

I laid on  my futon for an hour with my thoughts racing. I had to

eventually take Tylenol PM to get at least some sleep. I woke up early

enough to talk to the prof about the situation. He told me there wasn't

much he could do since he has to be fair, which is what I expected. So

I turned in what I had.

Friday I had to give a presentation on the paper, which I had been a

little concerned about. I was worried that I'd start to make excuses

while presenting, which is what I didn't want to do. So, I focused on

my structure and shaped the presentation in such a way that I wouldn't

even find a way to talk about why I didn't get it done aside from a few

minor things. My professor really liked it, and so did the class. I was

shocked about that. Today I got my paper back, and was blown away by

the B- that was on it. I'm still not exactly sure why I got that decent

of a grade. I'm not sure I deserve it, but it would appear that my

professor thinks I do.

My speech class has gone very well. I'm really happy with what I've

learned and how far I've come in this semester. I understand the craft

so much more now. I think I had one speech which wasn't that great, but

mostly I just got As. Oh, and one paper I got a slightly less than an A

on too. So, that probably was my best class overall.

My other two classes could have been better grades-wise, but I

definitely enjoyed them. Persuasion and Communication Theory...I'm such

a geek that I apply comm theory to whatever I'm doing. I see persuasive

techniques in the videos I do for departments of the school or in my

methods of educating the people I am helping with their computers. At

least I know I'm in the right field of study.

The holidays are upon us too. I have purchased one gift so far. I have

about five more to get, and I have about no money to get it with. It's

always this time of year that my income drops a bit due to all the

holidays clustered together. So, I'm a bit short on cash. I'm not out

of money by any means, but I'm just not in as great of shape as I was a

month ago. So, I have to budget to get by for the next month and a

half.

I applied for an internship in New York City. I'll find out if I get it

in a couple weeks. I'm really excited, but trying to keep my hopes to a

minimum. I didn't get the last one I wanted. So it's entirely possible

that I wont get this one too. Still, one of my professor friends thinks

I stand a very good chance. She read through my application and said

that I have all the experience I need to get the internship and beyond

that, my application suggests a lot of other things about me. Like, I

know the lingo of TV production. I can talk the talk and understand it.

I didn't answer things all cutesy. I put down some very serious

thoughts. So, cross your fingers.

Well, I have an exam in the morning. I should probably get to reviewing

the content. It's a pretty complex exam. So, I'll write more later this

week...since I'll have time. See ya then.

Luv,

Jess

The annual Women's Leadership Conference happened this past

weekend. I was one of the student organizers for the event. It was a

lot of work. Even now after the fact, I'm not sure it was worth it.

From the behind the scenes perspective, it was a fiasco. Though, I've

heard from others that it was great. So, hopefully only the organizers

thing it was horrible. There were some good things about it though.

Like for example, my friendship with Erika has been solidified into a

real friendship. Prior to this event, we worked together organizing,

but we were just acquaintences. Now we hang out for the fun of it.

We're kindred spirits. I'm really happy about that.

The second really awesome thing that happened was Lindsay. I'm sure all

of you are just now just dropped your jaws going "What?!!!", but

yes...I met someone. I wasn't expecting to at all. In fact, prior to

Saturday, I thought she was dating the girl she was hanging out with

every time I saw her. I had met her a week and a half prior when I

spoke at a college an hour away. My good friend Audrey had invited me.

Both Abigail and Lindsay gave me this vibe that they were a couple. So

yeah...when I found out on Saturday that they were all single, I was a

bit surprised.

Saturday night I was invited to hang out with the three of them. While

we were hanging out, Lindsay started playing footsie with me. Then she

started giving me eyes. We connected and were smiling and giggling.

Audrey and Abigail thought we were laughing at them. After the lights

went out, there was a little making out going on. I haven't done that

in two years. It was a very welcome change.

Sunday came and the conference ended. Due to my responsibilites with

the conference, I didn't get to say goodbye to them. Thankfully Lindsay

got my number from Audrey and called me later. We talked for an hour.

It was good. We have a lot in common. She's really cool. We seem to

have complimenting personalities. Apparently she thought I was out of

her league. That really blew me away. I've never thought of myself that

way...ever. It's always been the other way around for me. From my

perspective, I'm just doing what I think is right. I don't see why

people would look up to me or think of me as on some other level.

Anyway, I asked her out. Friday, while everyone else is succumbing to

the day of gluttany, Lindsay and I will be enjoying ourselves

(hopefully) at a restaurant and then we're going to probably watch a

movie or something. Yeah...pretty standard, but what can I say? I have

all this creativity when it comes to video, web work, and story

telling, but I can't be creative with a date. Go me. Still, I'm really

looking forward to it. I'll be sure to post updates.

School is just getting more and more stressful. I have 25 pages of

paper to write yet as well as four speeches not including my extra

curricular speeches, and I also have two presentations, one with a

group. That's not including finals. Last week Thursday night I actually

had a full out panic attack due to all the stress. I can't wait until

Winterim starts up. I need the break.

Anyway, it's past 2:00 in the morning. I have class at 9:30 am. I should get to bed. G'night all.

Luv,

Jess

Wow...it's been quite a while...I have been busy. This is the semester of speeches. I've been giving at least two to three speeches a week over the past month. It doesn't appear to be lightening up any time soon either. I suppose it's good to keep getting speaking experience, but it sure would be nice to get a week off. Anytime I'm not giving a speech, I'm taking an exam. So, this semester kinda stinks overall. I'm enjoying what I'm learning, but again...overwhelmed with work.

A few weeks ago I gave the keynote speech to Diversity Week on my campus. I had no idea I was going to be the keynote when I was asked to speak. I just assumed that it was another small presentation. Nope...I had one of the largest lecture halls on campus complete with two data projectors and a microphone. They gave out free food. They chalked all over campus. There were signs up. The news bureau did a press release. My home town newspaper even got notified. Such craziness.

I was kinda bitter about homecoming for a while. In a way I still am. The people that deserved to win didn't. The reason the people that deserved it didn't win is because of politics. The group that won always wins. Despite me having the more devoted fans, and the majority of the random vote, I still didn't win. The girl who did win queen admitted that my campaign was better. I put more effort into it. I spent more time campaigning. I stood outside in 40 degree weather wearing a wonder woman costume freezing my butt off. I spent $300 of my own money. I guess it just wasn't meant to be. At least I made it on court.

I had some of my own victories though. People remember me. Even the Monday after homecoming, very few remembered the name of the girl who won queen. There were a lot of people taking my picture at the parade. I had the entire faculty/staff behind me...too bad they couldn't vote. I think my favorite thing was the response I got from fans. I had people come up to me to tell me that I was their hero and that they voted for me. I had several of them do it right in front of the girl who won queen. I even had several people who got very excited to see me. Some wanted high fives. Some were just like "Oh My God!! You are SO Awesome!! I Voted for you!! You're my hero!! You ROCK!!". And I had a couple of those happen at the homecoming game while I was sitting literally right next to the queen. That never happened to her. To this day two weeks later, I still get comments like "You're the real queen to me." How cool is that? I mean...because of that I don't think I can say that I lost.

Here's some big news...I adopted a kitty. I've been thinking about it for a couple years now, and I finally did it. Her name is Inara (Yes I know I'm a huge dork for naming her after Morena Baccarin's character on Firefly). She's such a sweetie. I've never met a more mellow kitty. She sleeps a lot of course...but she's very loving. She loves laps. Oh yeah, she's two years old. She's spade, but not declawed yet. I have to take care of that soon. I considered not declawing her, but my landlord requires it. So...I guess I have to. I love her lots. I wasn't so sure I would want the responsibility at first, but now I've had her for three weeks and am really enjoying having her. Plus, I don't think I'll ever need a blanket again. She's so warm. I need to take her into the vet though. I think she may be sick.

I really need to learn to say no. I keep getting myself involved in more stuff, and it's nice and all. But I just need some time off. For two nights this week I am spending three  hours acting in the "Tunnel of Oppression" representing the trans population. Tomorrow night I'm giving two lectures. One of those is paid...so that's not bad. I'm getting something like $200. That'll pay for Inara's visit to the vet. I think that's worth it.

I'm not to happy about this, but I wont have work at all over winterim. Winterim is the break between fall and spring semesters. For us it's about five weeks long. Thankfully I have one week in there in which I do have work. The last four weeks I don't though. So...I'm considering unemployment for that time since neither of my current places of employment will allow me to work and no one will hire me for four weeks. I understand why I can't work at the help desk, even though I don't agree with the way they asked for people to work over that period. But my TV job in housing is what really bothers me. The Director of housing basically said "No hours for the TV station over winterim". In fact, that's almost a direct quotation from his e-mail. He didn't justify or anything. That was it. So now, I'm out of work. Unemployment is really my only option. Kinda stinks, but I need money to eat.

There are plusses to it though. As I mentioned earlier, I've been so busy that I haven't had time to sleep. Four weeks of nothing to do may be just what the doctor ordered. I can really use that time to catch up on some relaxation time. I'm going to play video games, watch movies, get back in to fencing, and sleep. I also want to start working on my book. So...perhaps I'll be in a little happier mindset when school starts up again in late January.

Another really cool thing happened last week. After we had one of our two hour live productions at the TV studio, four of my staff members expressed interest in having me stay on next year as station manager. I told them I can't because I'm graduating, and the studio is supposed to be student run. However, they still were adamant about it. How cool is that? I am really flattered. So they are going to start up a petition and seek out a grant to try to get me to be the TV studio's faculty advisor. The comment made was that this semester, the studio has run the best it has ever been run. I am so proud, but I think they forget that it's not just me that is making the studio so much fun. They all have a hand in making it what it is. :) Cheesy...but true. I doubt the director of housing would go for it, but if the job was offered to me, I'd accept.

I'm addicted to Smallville. It's no surprise to me. It's a superhero related show. The characters rock. Kristen Kreuk is really hot too. I have had the theme in my head since I started watching the show. I am looking forward to watching the rest of the seasons of it as well. It's my new favorite series.

Speaking of TV series...I finished the DVD of the TV series I produced along with my friends for my TV studio last year. It's a pretty rockin menu for a simple DVD. I hope people are interested in having the disk, because it was a fun show to make. We're working on the next series right now. I have to say I'm really really excited about it too. It's a heist series and is going to blow the campus out of the water. We're going to do some neat things with it. I'm working on the logo for it, and when I have it done, I'll post it.

The more I work as a producer and a studio manager, the more I want to do it professionally. I love my job. I love every aspect of it. I can't wait to build up my own studio/production company. Actually, Transcending productions is going to be in the credits of the new series. I'm putting a lot of my own money into it for props and such. So, I'll have to come up with some sort of neat animation for the production company to put at the end of the credits.

I'm submitting a video to a state wide video awards competition. It's a public service announcement for Crystal meth. The police department was blown away by it, and now we're looking at distributing it to other groups. The video would be free. I am happy about that, since the message needs to get out there. I still have to hear from Warner Bros. about use of the music from Batman Begins in the video. I think it'll be no problem, but I have to make sure.

The only other thing I have to add is that Jessica, the internet girl from Oklahoma, is still interested in me. After the whole Sabrina thing happened, I've been hesitant to ge

t into any sort of relationship online. I am still very distant in that respect. I'm not sure I take the whole thing seriously, and at the moment, I am happy about that. I do feel bad that she's still infatuated. I don't want to hurt the girl. However, if her feelings are real...then what do I do? She lives across the country, and any chance of us meeting is slim. However, she really wants to come see me in a few months. I'm not opposed to that, but I'm not trying to push her in any direction also. I'm doing my best not to lead her on, but at the same time, I'm happy that she's discovering herself. I guess I'm just caught between a rock and a hard place. Don't get me wrong, I like her. She's a beautiful girl and really smart. Heck, if she was here, I'd probably have a huge crush on her. I'd be stumbling over my words and such when she was around. I am just sick of internet bullshit. So...until something real happens, I'm probably going to be stuck in this situation. Granted...if her feelings continue...maybe theres more to this. We'll see.

Well, that's about it. Now that I've written yet another novel of a post...I'll get back to doing my job. Talk to you all soon.

Luv,
Jess

:(

Yup...that's right...I'm one of the five women across the entire campus that got voted on to court. I have two more days of campaigning until I find out who wins Queen. WISH ME LUCK!!!

Jessica "Wonder Woman" Anderson

P.S. Here are some photos I've been using for my campaign.

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