Posted on December 2nd 2008, 6:19 pm
This week has been an interesting challenge. I've been asked on numerous occasions how my Thanksgiving weekend was. Instead of the usual me being honest, I've been just telling people that it was fine. The reason being that I feel like maybe I shouldn't divulge my personal life to everyone since I talk so much about myself. In fact, only once did I say it was a horrible night on Thursday. I still haven't explained to that person why.
I've noticed that there is a pull and that I struggle to keep to myself. I want to share my experience and my pain. At the same time, I know it makes others uncomfortable. I've noticed that pull before, but instead of supressing it, I have succumbed instead. I was under the impression then that voicing my experiences was what people want to hear. I just have to learn the right times to let go. I think the pull I feel represents the "me me me" selfishness that my sister has always talked about that I've never seen.
Anyway, that's my quick update. I'll write more later this evening after the Shambhala Center visit.