Well, because there's so much more bad news, I'll start with the good news. I may...and I repeat may have met someone. I'm not sure yet. Well, actually, I did meet someone, but I don't know what's happening there. As usual, there's a story involved...so here goes:

Two weeks ago I sat at the LGBT meeting and a bunch of new people there, including some females. My goal this year has been to think of the new people as just new people and not as fresh meat, which is so common in the LGBT community. So I was just happy that there was more of a female representation for once. One of the girls and I had a bit of eye contact, but I just told myself "She's just a straight ally" and continued on with the meeting. That was pretty much it for that night.

A few days later she came into the helpdesk with a computer problem. I honestly didn't recognize her as the same girl. I did fix her computer problem though. After that Friday night rolled around and we had the annual National Coming Out Day drag show and dance. I hate drag shows with a passion, and most of the LGBT members know that. I would have just not gone to the event, but I felt responsible to since I'm an exec member and I wanted to shoot the promo for the group. So I was there with my camera in a very pouty mood. Eventually the show ended and people either got up to dance or to leave. As I'm waiting for people to clear out, I notice her in the front row by herself. She sees me and gets up and walks over by me and says hi. That was really all of the interaction between us since it was so loud in there. She left, and I started to wonder about her but told myself to stop. She's just a straight ally, right?

So Monday rolls around...National Coming out day. We had a table set up on the campus mall all day long to show pride and stuff. After one of my classes let out early, I walked over to the table, and who's standing there chatting with everyone? It's her. We talked and had a fun conversation. I seemed to get the impression she was just a straight ally. I was totally cool with that though. I saw her that night at the rally we had too. She didn't get up and talk, but we had a moment after I spoke. She just looked at me with these eyes...I still passed it off as straight ally.

So finally, yesterday I was signed up to work the booth in the student center for the breast cancer walk of hope. I walk up to the booth, and who's sitting there...but her. We got to work together for that hour. We just started talking and didn't stop. All this time I didn't know her name.I didn't know how to ask for it, but I didn't have to...she said it on her own. That made it easy. Her name is Claire. About 20 minutes to the end of our shift, some girl came up to relieve her early. She got her stuff and left. Again, I assumed she was just a cool straight girl. Then came the e-mail.

I headed off to work at 1:00 and checked my e-mail. Here's this message from her. So I open it up thinking nothing of it. She said that she was disappointed that the girl came early and was enjoying the conversation. She invited me to come to her dorm room to chat and maybe get some food. She wished me a rockin day and said she'd see me on Thursday. Needless to say I was a bit blown away. I still have my guard up. There's still the possiblity that she just thinks I'm cool, but now I'm thinking there's actually some interest. So...I guess I'll find out. I'll keep you all posted.

Now...on to the bad news.

I got paid on Friday, and I already am overdrafted on my account. I had overdraft fees from last week, two credit card bills, gas, and food. Amazingly, that took up all of my money. So, I have four dollars total to get me to the end of the month. I started applying for another student loan today. So hopefully that will help. However, I don't know what will happen now. This brings me to my next peice of bad news. My dad got laid off today. I got a call at about noon from him informing me about it. Talk about a shock. They eliminated his position entirely. It probably got outsourced, and likely my father will still vote for Bush...Anyway, I don't know if I'll get the loan now since I need a cosigner.

Since I'm broke, I no longer can celebrate my favorite holiday at the end of this month. I only have a couple of the needed peices to my costume. The rest of it I wont be able to buy. So...no fun for me. I guess I'll survive. I am going to be cutting as much as I can out of my bills. I'm dropping cable TV since I never get the opportunity to watch it. I'm going to cut back my phone plan too since I don't use all my minutes anyway. I'm really hoping I get that loan so I can get rid of my credit cards altogether. This just sucks. I hate money.

As far as school goes, I'm considering withdrawing from a class because I can't breathe. I have too much going on, and it's sad, but my extra curricular stuff is more important to me than the class. On top of that, I obviously can't cut hours at either of my jobs. I just feel so overwhelmed and so helpless to do anything.

So that's my shitty and good news for the week. More as it develops. Now...on with my night. I get to walk home in the cold rain. How's that for fitting? Write soon.

Luv,

Jess