I don't know what my problem is. I can never get myself to go to bed before midnight. It always just feels wrong if I try. I think I'm supposed to be up late, or something. And on top of that, I've been working so much lately too. In fact, just yesterday I worked 17 hours. That's a long day. I was so exhaused at the end. It really sucked. I can't wait until Tuesday, my next day off. That'll be nice.

So, yeah. I'm having computer troubles now. I've been watching a lot of movies lately, and well, I didn't really think Windows XP was ever going to crash on me. Needless to say, it happened. My video card is having issues with DVD playback. It goes even as far as hard booting the computer on it's own. So, I think I'm strongly considering a new card. Not too much choice there.

Aside from that, there really isn't too much going on right now. I'm really enjoying David Eddings' "Belgariad" series. I'm on the third book right now, and have no intention of stopping anytime soon. It's a great story. Takes me away from the huge frustrations of being at home and being emotional.

I still haven't done anything about my friend. Not sure what to do. I feel bad for being upset with her, but at the same time, I think my feelings are valid. I've explained the situation to a lot of people, and most of them say I have a good reason to be mad at her. I really don't know what to tell her. I want to apologize for being mad and explain how I feel. At the same time, I understand that she's moved on. I basically want to say something to the effect of that if she wants to do something, she should let me know. I'm not going to put a ton of effort into it anymore, only to get disappointed.

As for hormones, I'm still not seeing much of any difference. Though, I see myself everyday. The gradual changes I probably don't notice. I see my endocrinologist later this week, and she'll be taking measurements. We'll see how they compare. I'm thinking of mentioning to her that I want a different anti-androgen. Spironolactone makes me too dizzy. She may up my estrogen doses too. That'll make things interesting again.

Aside from the usual ups and downs that estrogen makes me very aware of, I think things have been pretty average. The snots continue to make life difficult. I saw my best friend tonight, and that was great. I really can't wait until school starts again. The more and more I'm at home and at work, the more I think that. It's amazing that last summer I felt completely the opposite. Hopefully summer will end fairly quickly. Now, it's time for sleep. G'night.