Posted on February 20th 2004, 5:31 am
My 23rd birthday was yesterday, and, as usual, it wasn't anything special. I've never really done anything for my birthdays. The most I did was go to Perkins that night. It was a very interesting visit though. There was a boy there who said hi. And seemed to know a lot about me; enough that it might creep someone out. It didn't bother me though. I remember being dumb like that in my boyish years. I remember how I felt and what I was thinking. I knew the guy was harmless. It was flattering to me. I never got to tell him I like girls though. One of these days....
That whole event was such a cool thing for me on so many levels. For one, it means I'm passing that well now that guys think I'm attractive. Two, it was seeing an event from the receiving perspective for once. Now I know how the girls I made an ass of myself in front of felt. What an interesting time.
Today wasn't anything special either. For once I got to make use of the sleep in day I set for myself. Every other Thursday I've had a doctor's appointment in the morning. I slept late and it felt wonderful. I went to class as usual. I kicked myself when I completely forgot about my advising appointment. I hate when I do that. We did have another panel today. It went really well. We got lots of great questions. I still love seeing people drop their jaws when I say I'm trans. It's one of my favorite things to see. It just makes me smile.
We had the LGBT meeting tonight, and it wasn't so great. It was like pulling teeth. We were all straining to just get through it. We need to do more planning. Next week WILL be better. It damn well better be if I can help it. I care about that group too much to let it be that way.
Tomorrow begins the big challenge. I have to shoot all day and into the next, then edit what I shot for 6 or so hours. I have to have a tape for them by 6:00 pm on Saturday to show at their Banquet. I don't know why I take these jobs, but I did. I think I enjoy challenging myself like that. We'll see how it goes.
It is snowing again tonight, which at first I hated. But, when I went to drop one of the group members off at home, there was another car stuck in the snow. We got out and helped push. It felt great to get someone else out, since I've been helped several times and haven't been able to repay them for it. It felt good. Later, when I got home, I stood outside on the street watching the snow fall past the street lights. I marvelled at the beauty of this world. It is truly amazing. I agree with Eddie Izzard, we have lost the true meaning of the word awesome. Because that's what I felt tonight, the original meaning of that word. I'll leave with that thought. Good Night everyone.