So this was an interesting weekend. Saturday was the party I had planned for a month. Though, it didn't go as well as planned. A lot of people couldn't make it. Five people were stuck at work and couldn't come. One was out of town on plans that couldn't be changed. There really weren't as many people as originally had been anticipated. We made the best of it though. Lots of frisbee, food, and lightsabers.

Now, one friend of mine, who I haven't seen all summer for more than five minutes...literally, had been excited about the party since I started planning it a month or so ago. She and her boyfriend were going to be there. Well, I knew her boyfriend wasn't going to enjoy it. He just doesn't fit in with us nerds. So, I informed her that I really didn't think he'd enjoy himself, but he's welcome to come. That was a few weeks ago. So, yeah, over the course of the summer, I've tried to get together with her several times. Every time she's blown me off for her boyfriend. Except for once, in which it was for her dad. That was all fine and dandy. I knew the party was coming up, and I'd get to hang out with her all day then. I mean, that was really the purpose of the party anyway, to get to see my friends for a whole day.

So ok, an hour before the party starts, she calls me up. She tells me that she can only be there for three hours because she has to help move her boyfriend's mom. I felt completely insulted. I mean, I go to college with her, and I rarely got to see her then. I pretty much felt that my friendship wasn't worth her time. I was angry with her, but I didn't want to be mean to her either. So I did my best to be kind and not show my feelings. I don't need to start a fight.

Well, I talked to some of my friends at the party after she left, and they told me my feelings were justified. That made me feel a bit better at least. However, the next morning when I told my parents, they threw it in my face. Said I was being selfish and that people change. I couldn't believe it. My parents both didn't have many friends growing up. So I guess, I'm not surprised that they felt that way. Sympathy is not a word any of my internal family members know, and they definitely don't show it either. I just got frustrated and more upset. See, the problem I have there is that they don't get the whole "lots of hormones = lots of emotion." They think I'm just as emotional as I was before. And if I mention that I have a ton of estrogen, they'll say I can't use my hormones as an excuse, and they'll blow me off.

Unfortunately though, it is true, the estrogen...especially at the levels I'm at...make my emotions much more severe than before. I was really upset by the fact that my friend blew me off yet again. I don't feel it's selfish at all to want to see my friend once in a while. The more people I talk to though, the more justified I feel. My parents seem to be the only ones who think it's selfish. Everyone else agrees with me. So there mom and dad.

Aside from that, we had fun at the party though. Lots of good fun. Sunday was draining. I had to work early and didn't get enough sleep. Work was boring due to no customers. The coolest part was that when I got home, I called back the old high school friends I hung out with on Friday. They invited me over to hang out. So I went and had a great time. It's good to know I have friends again. It's a real enlightening feeling. OK, I'm so tired, I'm going to pass out right here and now. I better get to sleep. G'night all.

Luv,

Jessica